Archive for the ‘Happiness’ Category

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Positive Psychology in Philadelphia, Pennsylvania

Friday, July 17th, 2009

I recently returned from The First World Congress on Positive Psychology in Philadelphia, Pennsylvania.  In keeping with the P theme - one word encapsulates my experience there: Powerful!  What follows is a summary of a few of my key take-aways from the Congress.

Ed Diener spoke on ‘New Findings on Happiness’: there is a difference between wanting and liking…happiness is impacted most when we learn to WANT what we LIKE.  You might WANT the high-paying executive job, but not LIKE the work that comes with that job.  If you LIKE the outdoors, learn to WANT or desire finding work that helps you do what you LIKE.  He also shared some findings about the latest Positive Psychology research, like the study you might have read that said married people are happier.  Diener said the newest research is showing – not so much that married people are happier – but that happier people tend to be married!  Interesting…

Giovanni Fava, from Italy, spoke on ’Well-Being Therapy’: he shared a powerful example of how people can identify and modify dysfuctional beliefs (or thoughts) to positively affect their well-being.  For example, if you keep a journal of your internal dialogue throughout the day and you notice a thought like ‘I can’t do this’, you can immediately decide to change the thought to ‘I can do the best I can and see what happens’.  They key is to identify the dysfuctional thought and then consider a modification of that thought, and notice what happens in terms of how you feel.  One way to modify the internal dialogue is to write down what an ‘external observer’ might say about the situation that is causing you difficulty; record an alternative interpretation…then notice what might shift for you.

Michael Frese, from Germany, discussed positive psychology at work – his research confirms that people do best at work when they are active; being able to set goals and take personal initiative positively affect achievement at work.  There is a “clear and strong correlation between personal initiative (which engages and ignites positive emotion) and performance”. 

Raymond Fowler discussed positive health and positive aging in his session “how to die young as late as possible”.  He made a compelling argument to support the point that when you die is a matter of choice – or a series of choices (eating, exercising, all the stuff we all know).  Positive emotion is critical in a long life; happier people are healthier (fewer bad habits, better nutrition, take better care of themselves).  

Barbara Fredrickson discussed Positivity – the Pathway to Flourishing.  She shared her “positivity prescription” on 3 to 1 to reinforce that you need the levity of positivity to counterweight the gravity of negativity.  Fredrickson shared her ‘Broaden and Build’ theory of positive emotion; when you experience and express positive emotion, you live longer.  It’s not enough just to ‘be positive’, the positive emotion must be genuine and heartfelt.  To create a mindset of positivity. be:

  • open
  • appreciative
  • curious
  • kind
  • real (authentic)…sincerity counts!

Visit Fredrickson’s website for free resources.

David Cooperrider was a true highlight at the conference.  He completely captivated the audience with his hopeful message on ‘The Discovery and Design of Positive Institutions’.  Mr. Cooperrider, generous in nature, makes his slides from the conference available at aicommons@case.edu.  The message from Appreciative Inquiry is ‘change at the scale of the whole’.  Ai involves a shift to see the world anew.  Mr. Cooperrider shared with us a foundation of AI; that the question we ask determines what we find.  If we look for deficits (what’s wrong here?) we find more deficits; if we look for possibilities (what’s right here?) we find more possibility.  Most organizations look for what’s wrong and let strengths take care of themselves.  AI encourages us to focus on strengths and the weaknesses will take care of themselves.  The approach is 1) appreciate the best of what is, imagine what might be, design what could be and create what will be.  The key is in the inquiry…the inquiry must be the change we wish to see in the world (not the one we want to avoid or to eliminate).

The conference ended with some words from Chris Peterson that encouraged us to look in the mirror as we are the future, and Martin Seligman, renouned as the father of Positive Psychology, who introduced a new term, ‘Positive Neuroscience’.  I, for one, am looking forward to hearing more about that in the future.  What about you?

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The Positive Psychology of “Meaning”

Thursday, April 30th, 2009

I dragged my butt over to the school to set up for Staff Appreciation Week.  ‘How come it’s always the same people who volunteer for these things?’ I muttered to myself, a bit resentfully.  My children’s school has over 600 students, and yet it appears that it is the same small group of parents volunteering for most school events.  At times, when my life is crazy busy and I am leaving my family ONCE AGAIN to head out to volunteer, I wonder what I am doing spending MY time to serve the needs of others.

Then, I walk in the front door of school.  It’s early in the morning, and the hallways are already ‘abuzz’ with kids and teachers getting ready to begin their day.  The first person I see is our Principal.  ‘Good Morning’ she says.  ‘Good Morning to you’ I say back.  She is dressed in a fabulous red leather blazer and looks refreshed and cheerful.  I realize how much I appreciate her; not, of course, for how she dresses, but for the kind of engaged and energized person that she is.

‘Thanks for all the treats’ she says.  I smile and say something like ‘you are so welcome; you deserve to be treated’.  I can’t help but smile inside and out as she genuinely smiles at me in that moment.

I head into the staff room.  There are a few staff members assembled and I greet them as I head to our ‘treat table’ (a table of cookies, cakes, cupcakes, candies, squares, and other yummy things baked by caring parents).  ‘Good morning’ I say to them as I pass.  ‘Good morning’ they respond, and add ‘thank you so much for all the great treats, we really appreciate them’.  ‘You are so welcome’ I say; feeling it even more than the last time, when I said it to the Principal.

I continue preparing the table of treats; I see a number of teachers coming in to fill a plate with some treats to take back to their class.  ‘Thank you’ is a regular comment in my direction.  ‘You are welcome’ is my response.  Each ‘thank you’ elevates my energy.  Each ‘you’re welcome’ from me elevates my energy also.  ’What is happening?’ I wonder.  I feel really energized! 

I returned to the school a couple of more times that day; to clean crumbs off the ‘treat table’ and to re-stock it to look inviting to school staff.  Each time I returned, I was bombarded with appreciation from the staff (who, we were appreciating with all the treats!)  I suddenly realized…it is a “gift” to volunteer.   

 Martin Seligman, the ‘father’ of Positive Psychology, speaks and writes about the connection between happiness and meaning; doing things that are not about self-interest but about the greater good.  I think that’s what happened during Staff Appreciation Week for me.  I certainly had considered this reality as I learned about, and became certified in, Emotional Intelligence ; yet there was nothing that could match the power of a ‘real’ experience.

So, the next time you find yourself muttering and wondering why you are doing something (that you know is good for others, yet you are feeling personally drained and maybe even a little self-centred); pay attention!  I’ll bet you will discover that the biggest payoff to volunteering is to the payoff to YOU.

“Meaning” is indeed a personal experience…and the best way to experience “meaning” is not in serving yourself, but in serving others.  I think that is a paradox “in” action!!

What do you think?

 

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Happiness, Productivity and The Law of Attraction

Sunday, March 1st, 2009

I believe that most of us understand that, generally, happier employees are more productive; they achieve better results for themselves and for the organization.  There is a lot of research to support the importance of positive emotions at work.  Much of my work is with leaders in organizations, who certainly understand this connection; and who are curious about what they can do to facilitate, encourage, and nurture happiness at work.

The first piece of advice I have for these leaders relates to a fundamental belief I have about effective leadership: you must model the way!  If the leader is not experiencing happiness and positive emotion at work, it is highly unlikely that the team members will either.  It is not enough to say the right words at a meeting, hoping to inspire the team to be pumped up and excited about their work.  If the words are not connected to true positive emotion in the leader, they fall flat.  And…if the leader is not ‘feeling’ what they are saying, they are less able to attract that feeling in others.  Have you noticed how much more believable, inspiring, and attractive someone is who is truly congruent with the message they are delivering?  As I work with leaders across a variety of organizations weekly, I continue to confirm that every leader indeed WANTS a happy team…and also WANTS that same experience for themselves.

So, what can you do to begin to create it for yourself and your team?  Try the three principles of the Law of Attraction as outlined by Michael Losier in his book of the same title.  1) Identify your desires.  You might, for example, identify what it is that you want to see in your team.  “I want a happy, productive team; who are smiling, laughing, sharing information, and connecting to explore opportunities and solve problems.”  2) Give your desires attention.  Once you have identified your desires…see them, hear them, feel them.  What are the cues in your environment that provide the evidence you seek?  How will you know your desire is manifested?  How will you know it when you see (hear, feel) it?  3) Allow your desires.  When you focus on what it is that you want to see, hear and feel; that is exactly what you will notice and experience.  Your attention is diverted from what is contrary to what you desire, to magnifying those moments when what you desire is before you.  Your focus will help to grow, or magnify the experience; you’ll then experience more of it yourself, you’ll then put more of it out into the workplace (model it), then you’ll get more of it, and so on, and so on.  See it, be it, free it!

Try this out; and comment back with a story to share.

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Posted in Engagement, Happiness, Human Resource Development, Leadership, Organizational Development | 5 Comments »

Mentoring Magic

Monday, February 2nd, 2009

I have delivered workshops and keynote presentations on the topic of Mentoring for the last 5 years.  My clients, like any organization today, are realizing that there are tremendous benefits to be derived from having a formalized Mentoring program in place.  Some of the benefits are:

  • addressing gaps in knowledge management/corporate memory, as older workers plan to retire in the next 5 years
  • being recognized in recruitment efforts as an employer or choice, as new talent is both interested and well versed in the topic of mentoring
  • using mentoring as a way to assist in retention of staff, since the confidential nature of the relationship facilitates open discussions about the protege’s motivation and general job satisfaction
  • providing for career management and development of key talent, since mentors can provide valuable information and networking opportunities to impact human resource/succession planning

Beyond these benefits, which are significant to any employer, Mentoring programs provide another huge opportunity – mentor engagement!!  Talk to just about any mentor, and they will comment on how the experience of Mentoring increased their own engagement and energy for their work, as much (if not more) than the protege experienced!  The magic of Mentoring is that while it is often positioned to benefit the protege, the real benefits to the organization go beyond the protege to the mentor!

I also happen to deliver workshops and keynote presentations on Pre-Retirement Lifestyle Planning; and consistently the message of the near-retiree is ‘I want to leave on a high note in my career’; ‘I want to leave a legacy’.  Positioning your Mentoring program to benefit both parties involved means that the organization benefits from higher productivity on all levels.  Additionally, you’ll have a lot more interest from senior staff to volunteer when they are reminded that there are trendous benefits to being a mentor.

Another workshop I have delivered for select corporate clients is Attendance Management.  In every session, the challenge of engaging and motivating older workers comes up.  Certainly not every older worker is under-performing (most I know are very high performers); however, there are some.  In these workshops, managers who attend will readily admit that often their older workers are disengaged and demotivated (just putting in time) because they are treated that way in the organization (“John’s ‘retired’ on the job so we don’t consider him for new projects”).  Think about the possibilities to impact performance with this group by engaging, and re-energizing them, as mentors.

If you have not already thought about implementing a Mentoring program in your organization, read this article on Mentoring and consider the benefits to you, your staff, and your business results.

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Smile; and the World Smiles WITH You!

Tuesday, December 30th, 2008

I have always been fascinated at this time of year.  People are generally pretty happy as the holiday season approaches; although we are busy, we tent to more often smile at each other and wish each other a ‘Merry’ this or a ‘Happy’ that.  Have you noticed that when someone smiles at you, the urge to smile back is irresistable?  Really, it IS irresistable!

I recently read about the latest discovery in Neuroscience; the presence of mirror neurons.  Mirror neurons are exactly what makes a smile from someone irresistable; when you see a smile, your mirror neurons engage and you smile back.  Of course, the same is also true.  Seeing a frown, inspires a frown back. 

There is something else that is interesting about this discovery of mirror neurons, and about what we have discovered lately about social intelligence (and how we catch each other’s emotions, just like we catch colds from each other).  When you see someone else smile, and you smile back; the muscles you use in your face to smile signal to your brain that you feel good…and you start to feel good.

Try an experiment.  Head out to do your usual chores.  Then, smile…regularly.  What do you notice?  I’ll bet you notice MANY smiles back at you!  You will definitely feel better; and guess what, you will have a role in others feeling better too!  No better gift, I think, at this time of year!!

Happy New Year!!

Posted in Engagement, Happiness, Leadership, Resilience | 8 Comments »

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